It’s not once that I’d visited the waiting room of an agency and it wasn’t once when I wondered what happened behind those jazzy, glitzy walls of an advertising agency. Today I feel sorry for the lonely guard, the ignorant CD picker and almost everyone who hasn’t made a trip to these wonderful places (read madhouses).You enter into the workplace, where you’re generally welcomed by an arrogant look from the pictures of the idol, heroes ranging from the further up the ladders like Mr. David Ogilvy (with all due respect), Mr. Leo Burnett, Mr.Roger Reeves or the young and spirited Mr. Che Guevara. They look stern, but at once you come to know that they’ve done something for the industry (rather lots).
Then starts your stint with the ‘hi’s and the ‘hellos’. Their sound and enunciation (along with many other sounds) generally change in an agency. They are more of ‘hey’llos and haaiiees, and for those who don’t like to be ostentatious with words, use the casual, but the most amicable bhainchod which literally translates into a ‘lovable person’ and is also a versatile punctuation. So now you can puff up with self-importance once you’re asked “Kaisa hai bhain***d?” I do (smug).
The creative department would be chock-full of rustics, by the window side, with pencils half in their oral cavities. Sshh…they’ve accepted wisdom. The only people who think and act in an ad agency. The award goes to them. These copy guys would see you, but feign, feign that the pencil tastes better. No response. Move further on. The art and layout guys…they’d reply. However, they choose to greet you back on their Macs, with Adobe Illustrators and Macromedia Freehands, like you’re going to mark them on their sense of creativity and inventiveness or as if you belong to a gang of idea stealers.
Now is the boss. Maybe he’s there before you that day. With nose buried in IBM Lotus Notes (a standard e-mail portal for ad agencies), yes, this one is the happiest to see you. You’d find a sense of extreme solidarity every morning on his face. And now you know what’s ensuing…the fight for life. In general they are nice people, especially because they identify what you’re going through. They, therefore bestow pains on an easy scale.
The studio. This is where it all starts and ends. They’d acknowledge you well. The only people to shake hands in an agency (this is unless you’ve come with a job for them; otherwise they shake your arse). A straight-on-your-face “Baad mein aana” or a modest “Abhi nahin ho payega” is their speech tick. You, poor servicing fella, have to come back with an equally humble “Theek hai”, scorning and reviling them on your way back.
There are good times too. The lunch, where all sit together, like educated people, cussing the food or generally mocking at other teams. The birthdays, when half the times you look at the cakes being smudged from the face to the hair (at all possible locations) and then wondering if taking birth was actually all-that-needed. There are other good times too, like your boss’s day off or an approaching Friday evening.
There is an undetectable part to an ad agency too. These set of humans (or whatever) are called clients. They sit in their offices, probably which are well air-conditioned. They are cool and relaxed people (or whatever), who are invariably brought into being to light fire up our arses. Briefs from them (unless they come with gifts) are a hex and even if they don’t bother u much, they are not considered good quality. I don’t know why!
There are times of the ooh-s and the aah-s too. People, especially girls in an ad agency are by and large gorgeous and articulate as well (Surprise!!). You also tend to come across men who can boggle you. Weird hairstyles, heart-shaped goaties and freaky styles of chewing gums all originate from these agencies. And you go ooohh.
Nights are real nights here. Booze, dope, dance or misuse. All allowed. Play BC Sutta on full volume or watch Mallu sex clips on no volume… everything’s acceptable. Eventually these are just tricks to console yourself of a yet-another fucked-up tomorrow. Oh yes, the ‘F’ word is the life-blood of these places. You can’t say “FUCK” (in various voice modulations)… and you are tossed and hurled chez vous.
But even with all these ups and downs and the aah-s and the doh-s there’s one thing powerfully attached to an ad-agency. Every morning, when you wake up, you essentially want to go to this place. Believe me. Your ad agency never fails your slice of enjoyment and knowledge. All you know is that it’s gonna be another day, another fun, another war, another artwork and another LIFE! Life in the style of an advertising guy……….Ask for it!
